I was looking in the picture folders and found a picture of my son wearing his very first kopiah and baju melayu, when he was like 7 month old. The first Hari Raya we celebrated as a family.
I never imagine I will say this, after all the endless sleepless nights, and the hard work of raising a son, well, time does fly and now at almost 3 years old, I can see the more independent person in him.
The first year was really a blur. I was miserable. I have no help during day time when Hubby went to work. I was alone, on my own. I can’t even go to the kitchen to eat or cook without having a crying baby, demanding my attention.
We tried all possible way to make it work – bought the Jumperoo to be put in the living hall so that I can eat my meal for 5 minutes, a baby Bjorn carrier so that I could carry him around while having hands to do work and a high chair in the kitchen which I have to drag nearer to me so that he can see what I was doing at the stove and the sink. And when he finally slept I was held captive by his side because he has such a strong sensor and a very light sleeper too. I prefer to do everything possible when he was awake rather than have a cranky baby who didn’t have enough quality sleep.
Not to forget the fact that he nursed all night long, to the extent that I regretted my decision to exclusively breastfeed him. Of course Hubby couldn’t help much because his son didn’t want his Abah, no matter how eager and desperate Abah was to relieve Mama’s burden.
On the bright side, after the chaotic first year, I was a much better person. I tried my best to make it work – I cooked and completed the house chores like washing, cleaning and gardening faster. I found effective ways to make certain daily routine simpler. Life for me was never the same again.
Now after two years, I can see the good result of the attachment parenting. I have successfully breastfeed my son for 2 years and still doing so (although I really hope he will wean off from the breast completely very soon). He is now a bright, very active and very cheerful child (which at times remind me of the chirping bird on the tree..haha!) Although the first 2 years of raising him was such an endurance challenge to my will power and physical strength, (even now it still does) I wouldn’t want to change a thing.
Looking at him now, I realize that I certainly must have done most of the raising-a-child things right, after all. Hopefully I won’t do much damage in many more years to come..haha!