A Homemaker’s Diary

Sometimes when I was out of patience and energy to wait for my son to fall asleep, I made promises. Like last weekend, I told him if he sleeps, we can go out and buy Hot Wheels.

So on Saturday we went out. Told him that he can choose Hot Wheels that he likes. So he did choose 2 and near the counter where we were supposed to pay there was a display of Cars 2 merchandise. So he looked here and there while Hubby went away to get something else (the reason why we went to the shopping complex in the first place).

Now he wanted to buy two Cars merchandise which costs RM35.90 each. So thinking that I know better since I’m the Mama, I told him why don’t we go and check out more choices in Toys R Us and see whether they have wider choices there. So I left the 2 Hot Wheels behind.

He checked out most of the Cars merchandise in Toys R Us but he was not interested to buy anything. In the end we chose for him a set of 7 Cars 2 character die casts which cost a lot more than what we initially planned to spend. But I thought he might enjoy it more, after all he’s all into Cars these days.

He kept on saying Hot Wheels as we walked to the parking lot. We thought he mistakenly thinks that all small cars or die casts as Hot Wheels. In the car, he kept on asking about Hot Wheels. Even when we reached home he kept on saying Hot Wheels.

Then it hit us that maybe what he really wants are those 2 Hot Wheels that he has carefully chose. Those two that will only cost us RM15 instead of RM200++ No wonder he was not interested to buy anything when I asked him to choose because in his mind, he thought I already paid for those 2 Hot Wheels.

Later that night when I have some time alone, I can’t help to think that here I am thinking since I’m the Mom, that I should know better and decide for my son what’s the best for him yet I want him to have his own opinion and make his own decision in life. I have been so caught up in my ego as a parent thinking that what I chose for him is what could bring him real happiness. I should have known better.

I hope I will not make the same mistake again. This time it might just be some toys, but later as he grows up, I don’t want my decision and my choice to be the cause of his unhappiness in life.

I lost a friend today, to stage 4 stomach cancer.

It is so sad. I knew her since we were like 18, 19 way back during college years. We were even working in the same company after both of us graduated from Uni.

About 2 months ago, she decided to quit her job and be a full time mom. She messaged me via Facebook asking about things to do at home, things that could earn money while carrying her task as a mother of two. Her 9 month old daughter is still breastfeeding when she was warded to the hospital.

I am glad that I made time to chat with her that day. That was the last time we communicated before she fell sick and went offline. And then I found her status stating that doctor suspected she has lymphoma cancer which turned out to be stage 4 stomach cancer. It then has spread to her bone marrow. I visited her in the hospital on 16th September, almost didn’t make it but now as I am typing this I was glad that we braved through the heavy rain. She was surrounded with family when I visited her.

Seeing her on the hospital bed, with blood infused to her vein, bruises all over her body, no longer able to digest food with sick and bloated tummy made me realized how short and frail life could be. It doesn’t matter what kind of car you drive, how big your house is or how much money you make and have in the account, in the end if you are lucky, it’s your loved ones that will be by your bedside day and night, and that is priceless.

That night after I visited her, for the first time as I lie on bed waiting for my son to fall asleep, I feel really blessed to be a mother. I imagined her not being able to breastfeed her daughter and not even able to see her 4-year old son in the hospital since before Hari Raya.

I pray that she is in a better place now. Al Fatihah.

For those who are still in the dark about the massive and long awaited annual book sale ever, do check out their official website – http://www.bigbadwolfbooks.com/.

Now they even have twitter and facebook where they usually post weekly contests to get the media pass, which I always miss because the timing was never right for me..huhu! (err..even if I get to guess the price on time, I never get the amount right either..huhu!)

Anyway, the good part is Hubby already applied for his annual leave on the first day of the sale so that he can go buy the first batch of possible books that I might need and like to read. Emm..even if I don’t like the books, it will be good to hoard them, especially children books as our son already recognized alphabets. It will be very soon when he will be reading books like nobody business (if he takes after me..haha!)

This time the wolf said he will be bringing 1.5 million books for the sale. Note to self: I have to keep myself updated for the next 2 weeks on what are the latest best sellers or whatever literature award winning titles so that I know what to grab when I go to the Big Bad Wolf sale.

Taken from Raising Your Spirited Child:

“Kids go through developmental surges. You can mark it on your calendar. Somewhere around their birthday and their half birthday, you can expect trouble. They get cranky and uncooperative. They might be incapable of doing what they were able to do just a few weeks before. Nothing seems right. They’re easily frustrated. Every time you turn around, they’re crying about something else. They won’t cooperate. They want to be held and then push you away when you hold them. They’re angry–angry at you, at the world, and at themselves. They are more easily upset by anything.

The developmental theorists tell us that this is a time of disintegration, a time when children are moving from one stage of development to another. Their inner systems are restructuring, creating a new, more complex way of understanding the world. Think of five building blocks. Stack them once on top of the other until you have a tower of five blocks. This is your five-year old–his inner structure that controls how he sees the world and responds to it. It works well for him, but as he nears his sixth birthday, changes begin to occur. A new block will be added to the structure, but it won’t just be added to the top of the stack. Instead, the tower will come crashing down; it will disintegrate and a new structure with six blocks will be formed. This time it may be in the shape of a pyramid, with three blocks on the bottom, two in the middle, and the sixth resting on top. It will be a totally different structure. During this construction time, which can take four to six weeks, everything that was working well for your child doesn’t seem to be operating anymore. He becomes overwhelmed easily and is more vulnerable to spill-over tantrums.

It happens to all kids, but as is always true for spirited children, their reactions are much stronger. Mark your calendar and be ready for the surges.”

My grand niece turned one early this year. Since I only have a son, I was not sure what a toddler girl that age might love to play with. After spending some times pondering the range of girl toys at Toys r Us, we decided this Play Doh cooking set will do..after all I’m pretty sure her aunt at home could show her how to mould all those Play Doh into chicken..haha!

As far as I can remember I think I never have such toys when I was a child. Now that I am a mother, I always feel that having a child is a great excuse for us to enjoy toys that we never have during our childhood. What do you think?